


Big Fish, Small Pond

by meepahdeedoodah



Category: Everybody's Talking About Jamie - Dan Gillespie Sells/Tom MacRae
Genre: Accidental Outing, Homophobic Language, Hoo boy do I love those commas, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Yikes, no proofreading we make typos and grammatical errors like men, sort of underage in the first chapter because they're both 16 and they kiss, wow lots of homophobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 09:36:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15838581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meepahdeedoodah/pseuds/meepahdeedoodah
Summary: “I'm not gay”Those three words were the lie he'd been telling himself for as long as he could remember. Dean Paxton wasn't gay. Everybody knew that, but now he's at prom, and Jamie New is in a dress and asking him to dance, and he just has to say it again.





	Big Fish, Small Pond

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really just trying to beef up some of the hcs katkitters and I were discussing a while back, following Dean throughout his life.
> 
> This chapter is more of a continuation of the last scene at the prom, but eh, it's nearly 2 am and I haven't proofread it at all, so bear with me.
> 
> NOTE: a character does get accidentally outed in this scene, and it really really sucks, so if you don't want to read that, just leave a comment and I'll try my best to summarise the chapter for you.

“I'm not gay”

Those three words were the lie he'd been telling himself for as long as he could remember. Dean Paxton wasn't gay. Everybody knew that, but now he's at prom, and Jamie New is in a dress and asking him to dance, and he just has to say it again.

“It’s alright. I'm not really a girl either”, came Jamie's response, but the funny thing is that Dean wasn't really sure who he was telling when he said he wasn't gay.

~~~~~

They dance. They have a great time, and they dance together for at least 6 songs before they agree that they both need some air, and so step out of the hall and into the corridor. Just in time too, Dean thinks, as the next song starts playing and it's a slow one.

Jamie leans against the wall, face flushed from all the dancing and Dean does the same next to him. They're close, less than a foot between them. Dean turns to look at Jamie and _god, he's beautiful_ , and just for a second, Dean Paxton forgets that he isn't gay, and closes the gap between them.

It's quick, stilted, and uncomfortable, but for the first time Dean knows that this feels right. He's kissed girls before, Bex and Becca and Taylor, and every single time he knew that it just wasn't supposed to feel like this.

Jamie jerks back, and stares, wide-eyed, at Dean. Fair enough, Dean thinks, as Jamie begins to vocalise his reaction.

“What the fuck, Dean?”

Dean stammers but Jamie doesn't give him the chance, pushing off the wall so he can face Dean, putting as much space between them as possible. “What kind of a sick joke is this? I thought you were past this, at least for tonight! It’s our last night at school ever and yet you still find time to make fun of the gay boy? Unbelievable, Dean, un-fucking-believable. You know what? You’re th-”

“I didn’t kiss you to make fun of you, Jamie.” Dean cuts him off, voice soft, and sincere, but Jamie’s having none of that, livid, with his arms in the air, he responds.

“Oh yeah? Then why, Dean? Go ahead, tell me! Tell me all about why you kissed me, if it weren’t a joke?”

“BECAUSE I’M GAY,” came Dean’s yell, and there was a beat of silence, and you could almost see the moment he broke. “I’m gay and you’re beautiful. And confident and amazing and unashamed and all the things I’m not and you just shine Jamie. You’re shining. Every day, all the time. You’re gorgeous, and you’re kind and funny and you’re you. And you just shine.”

Another beat of silence, and they’re both breathing heavily. Adrenaline, Dean supposes, either that or he’s about to have a heart attack from how fast his heart’s going.

And then Jamie’s walking towards him with a determined look on his face, and Dean thinks that he’s going to brush past him and leave, but no, Jamie’s walking straight towards him, and it’s slightly intimidating, because his heels give him some extra height, not that he needed any more, he already had about 2 inches on Dean to begin with, but then he’s standing in front of him and taking his face in his hands and Dean meets him halfway and it’s a mess. It’s a beautiful, perfect, mess. Dean raises his hands without breaking the kiss to tentatively place them on Jamie’s shoulders, and all he knows is just how right this feels, and how he never wants this moment to end.

Dean isn’t sure how long they stand there, he’s simultaneously thinking about a hundred things at once, and nothing at all. But then there’s a noise from behind him and the door swings open and Mickey and Vicki are there, and he and Jamie instantly split apart, putting at least 4 feet between them. Dean can’t pretend nothing happened because _they already saw_. His mind is travelling a million miles an hour and while Vicki looks equal parts flabbergasted and joyous, Mickey is somewhere between horrified and murderous, and Jamie, Jamie looks terrified, and Dean thinks that for maybe the first time since they met in Year 7, Jamie New is properly speechless.

“What the fuck, Dean?”

It’s Mickey’s voice, and there’s venom in it. It seemed like fate wanted this, or didn’t want this, or whatever, Dean couldn’t think about all that right now, because of all the people to walk through that door and catch them, Mickey was probably the worst, right up there with Dean’s father and that one supply teacher he had in Year 8 for maths. Anybody else in the entire school coming through that door would’ve been better than this, even Bex, who is, as far as Dean knows, still dating him.

By now Vicki already has her phone out of her clutch and is, presumably, texting everyone, and Mickey has taken a step back, and all of a sudden horrified and murderous has turned to straight up disgust, as he stares at Dean and the words form in his mouth. Dean feels his phone go off in his pocket but doesn’t really register it because it’s at that moment Mickey takes a few steps forward and speaks.

“You know what? I’m glad it’s prom tonight, because that never means I’ll ever have to see your ugly fairy mug ever again, you gross, disgusting, knobhead.” He shoves Dean, and Dean’s too stunned to respond, and then Mickey is leaving and Vicki is following him. 

He’s panicking now, he can hear his heartbeat in his ears, and every sound is just too loud. He feels Jamie reach for his hand but that’s not something he can deal with right now, maybe not for a long time, and so he takes one last look at Jamie and flees. He doesn’t go back to prom, and he doesn’t stop to say goodbye to anyone. He can’t. He knows his parents aren’t home, won’t be back for a few more hours at least, so he goes straight home, and doesn’t really do anything but sit on his bed for a while. He doesn’t cry, he never has, but he knows that somewhere throughout the event, something inside him had broken, and if a couple of tears roll down his cheeks, who would know? Tree falls in a forest and all that shit.

~~~~~

Later that evening as he’s getting ready for bed, he checks his phone for the first time since he got home.

2 new messages, the screen says, over a selfie of him and Bex that he supposes he’s going to have to change at some point soon. He unlocks his phone and prepares for the worst.

 **Vicki @ 21:43 tonight;** dont worry i wont tell anyone and i’ll make sure mick doesnt either. i’ve got this x

 **Vicki @ 22:53 tonight;** im here if u ever need to talk xxx

Dean lets out a sigh of relief and allows himself a small smile. He doesn’t have a plan for the morning let alone the next few months, but he chooses not to think about that now, and climbs into bed, most decidedly not thinking about a certain Jamie New.

**Author's Note:**

> Can't promise any chapters real soon, but there will be more at some point. I'm thinking the next one being set 6 years later, so that could go either great or horribly, and only time will tell. If anything, this is more of a prelude to the original fic structure. We'll see.
> 
> Also leave Mickey be with how bad his insults are, he's only sixteen, and I'm really bad at being mean...
> 
> #hashtag adopted


End file.
